Freelancing and Forgetfulness

I was pretty sick last week (um, ok. Two weeks ago, but I haven't really done much since), and a bunch of stuff piled up. So what do you do when you just forget to do something?

I tend to beat myself up over it. I do. I'm not sure exactly what leads to these extended periods of lethargy, or the complete dropping-of-the-ball on an important project, but it's a long-engrained habit to get angry.

It's a cop-out to say it's because of my parents, but I guess it kind of is - if you're like me, you know the drill. I have wonderful parents, both with their own set of extreme quirks, but my dad has never "just forgotten" about a project or duty. When tasks don't just disappear out of your brain as though they've never existed, it's kind of hard to understand that explanation when it is offered up by your kid.

"Your report card says you missed six homework assignments."
"Yeah, I guess so."
"How did that happen?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know? How can you not know?"
"I just... forgot, I guess."
"How could you just forget about something you had to do?"
"I don't know, I just did."
"Did you write the assignments down?"
"Yes."
"Then how did you forget about them?"
"I don't know."

I mean, really, it sounds like a cop-out. As a parent who doesn't 'just forget' things, I'm sure I'd read that as 'didn't want to do it, was lazy, and is trying to get out of trouble.' And then it's endlessly frustrating to both parties.

Whatever the reason, at this point when I lose my keys or I realize I completely forgot to do my two required blog posts this week, I freak out. I stomp around the house. I shout. When I'm looking for something, I tend to throw things aside with way more violence than necessary. I make pronounced judgements on the quality of my life and my own failures as a human being.

So this week, I'm not going to do that. I'm going to take a deep breath instead, and then do what I need to do to make it right. Forgot to do some blog posts? Write off a quick letter of apology. If they want to fire me, then I will find another job. It's ok.

I suspect that will be a much healthier way of looking at things.

How do you handle it when you drop the ball?

Shameless Self Promotion

I got a job! My first non ELance, for reals independent freelance gig, with http://www.sparknotes.com/mindhut <-- That's the shameless self promotion part. I will be writing articles for them on various nerdy subjects. At last, a way to profit from my unhealthy obsession with all things fantasy and sci-fi. (I know it's cool to be a nerd now but... well... I make seasoned D&D players and LARPers uncomfortable now and again.)

I have my own contributor blog and everything! Username Jasper. I write about whatever I think is interesting and nerdy. This first week was really hard: I have at least three half written articles that I've been to timid to submit. I'm still kind of nervous about putting myself out there like that - why am I funny? Why should people listen to me ramble on about various and sundry topics? I don't mind people not accepting my topics, but I really didn't want my first proposal to be rejected. Puts a bad tone over things to come.

Luckily, while the Mindhut accepts submissions on whatever you like, the editors also provides some sample topics. When a movie trailer popped up early in the morning, I volunteered for it immediately and promised it within two hours, so I didn't chicken out. And they liked it. So, moral of the story: just try! Force yourself to try! Pick something you think you can do, and do it. You'll surprise yourself, most likely.



And in closing, a friend of mine once sent me this video to illustrate how I treat men. I've scaled it back, but it's why this is a great job for me. Warning: nerd stuff ahead. http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6534168/im-such-a-nerd-with-katrina-bowden